“Our culture made a virtue of living only as extroverts. We discouraged the inner journey, the quest for a center. So we lost our center and have to find it again.” Anaïs Nin
I'll be honest,I'm a loner, a homebody.I enjoy some interaction but for the most part,I prefer to be with my family. I don't like to share much about myself and in social settings,I would much rather crawl under a rock. I'm most definitely NOT a social butterfly,in fact I often say the wrong things and when introduced to someone new I overcompensate my shy demeanor with a loud and often times ridiculous hello.I like to work hard and go after my dreams, but in my soft spoken way. I like to do things on my own, in my own way, in my own time.
This past year, on this road of self discovery,I realized at last,that I'm ok with all of that! Thankful for the journey and the lessons, I've identified who and what I am, and I am no longer trying to hide it. But through the process I somehow managed to come out of my shell and realized that I had a second whisper that slowly crawled it's way up into my heart. The need of stepping outside my comfort zone...something that as an introvert I find very difficult...but none the less I knew it had to be done and it could only be achieved by stepping out from behind a computer screen.
So when deciding to step out of my comfort zone this year by teaching live, this was a very big deal for me. In doing so I realized the shy quiet person inside me,also needed to see and feel the kindness of others,the hand holding and encouragement building....that it's ok to feel awkward in social settings,that, even though I want to throw up when people are looking at me,...it can also be so very rewarding when sharing, laughing, and understanding with like minded individuals. Stepping out of my comfort zone,has given this quiet little soul courage to continue even when all I want to do is turn back. From my quiet place, I can still shake the world in my own gentle way, but by stepping out every now and then my voice becomes clear from the inside out and the shaking becomes a vigorous quake,creating ripples in the ocean of my spirit.
My quest for 2014 is in finding balance. My strong need for the inward journey as well as the open traveler,often making mistakes and saying the wrong things but learning as I go.
May you find peace and balance in this new year.
"Long ago God drew a circle in the sand exactly around the spot where you are standing right now. You were never not coming here. This was never not going to happen.” — Elizabeth Gilbert
Here's to making every minute count,